The Kingdom of Cheeseland Land of Cheese is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Mr Not Justa Cow with a fair hand, and renowned for its state-planned economy, absence of drug laws, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, democratic population of 1.524 billion Cheeseans are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cow Town. The average income tax rate is 69.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but sluggish Cheeselandian economy, worth 49.7 trillion Cheeses a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Basket Weaving, Book Publishing, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 32,582 Cheeses, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The Supreme Court vehemently protects civil rights and the right to privacy, counselors have to sign pledges supporting gay rights before they can speak to any patients, bored politicians often entertain themselves with games of Simon during important votes, and disgruntled jocks are forced to play tetris for entertainment. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cheeseland Land of Cheese's national animal is the Dairy Cow, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Cheeseland Land of Cheese is ranked 20,591^st in the world and 1,341^st in Balder for Most Beautiful Environments, with 1,010.56 pounds of wildlife per square mile.